Sometimes It’s The Little Things

Even the tiniest of wounds, if you suffer enough of them, can cause us to bleed to death. Even the smallest weight if we carry it long enough will crush us.

 I don’t know if it’s my blood type, something I eat, or just my welcoming personality but I am a magnet for every biting insect known to man. I’ve never met a mosquito or no-see-um that didn’t want to stay for dinner. This past high school football season I had the immense joy watching my son play and the pride that comes with knowing that he has spent almost three years giving his all to this team. However, after a full season of games you can play connect the dots on my legs. Not even bug spray helps! I am not sure what’s worse, waiting and keeping vigilant to see if I’m going to be bitten, the bites themselves, or the itchiness afterwards. 

As a priest and pastor I have the privilege of listening as people share their struggles. It could be challenges in a relationship, financial difficulties, a troubling health diagnosis, or a crisis of faith. These traumas and wounds can feel overwhelming and that they are so big that we can’t wrap our minds and hearts around them. We wonder how God could ever help us or give us the victory that we hear so much about. Meeting people where they are in those situations means pushing ourselves as pastors to listen about how God is present in their life and how they might invite God to be present in the here and now of these challenges. 

“But sometimes it isn’t just about the big things. Sometimes it’s about the “little” wounds that we suffer day in and day out, the small cuts, bumps, and bruises that beat us up.“

But sometimes it isn’t just about the big things. Sometimes it’s about the “little” wounds that we suffer day in and day out, the small cuts, bumps, and bruises that beat us up. I’m talking about the daily frustrations we face in our work and relationships, the misunderstandings and disappointments that threaten our peace and joy, and the inbox that never seems to read “0”. 

There is a distinct feeling of helplessness when we feel like we are being swarmed by our problems. I see this alot during the holiday season both in and outside of the Church. In our personal lives it can be about decorating our homes, making travel arrangements, and purchasing everything on our gift list. In the ministry of the Church it can be about making sure the bulletins and slideshows are correct, that committees are organized for the special charity and fellowship events, and that we have been faithful in imparting the true meaning of this advent season; the celebration of the coming of Jesus Christ into the world and the anticipation of his coming again in glory at the end of the age. What many people may not recognize is that for many clergy they face both of these challenges at the same time. 

I am blessed with a spouse and family who are extra supportive during the advent and Christmas season. We communicate about expectations for celebrations and I work with my wife to make sure that we are working together to do the shopping and prepare our home. In my parish I feel the support of my Church family with whom I work as a team to create the atmosphere of fellowship and worship that make the Christmas celebration holy and life-giving. I am grateful to everyone who supports me. But I know that not everyone is so lucky. 

Keeping our head above water can be hard when we are weighed down by the burdens of life. It doesn’t have to be the boulder that weigh us down. It can be because we are carrying 100 pebbles in our pockets. And this is the time of year when there is so much to carry. While the holidays are a time for fellowship and family, we need to remember that not everyone has the gift of a family that they can easily visit. It’s for this reason that we need to check on those people who we worry might be swimming alone. We need to invite them to join us in worship. We need to invite them into our homes and offer them a seat at our dinner tables. 

And we also need to reach out. This can be hard if we have been hurt or rejected before. As a person who likes to try and do things themselves this is a lesson I need to learn again and again. For clergy this means practicing three important habits. 

1. Don’t take on the whole world yourself. Not every task has to be done by the priest or deacon. The help of one or two faithful volunteers can make a huge difference in the workload we feel during this holiday, and it helps to build others in their ministry to the Church. 

2. Find sabbath wherever you can. Days off may be interrupted by pastoral calls, funerals, or special events but we all need to find the time to rest and recharge. Taking time for ourselves isn’t a betrayal of our ministry, it's being faithful to the stewardship God has given us of our minds, bodies, and souls. 

3. It’s okay if not everything gets done. I have a thousand ideas of what I want to do for the holidays and feasts of the Church. It would be impossible to do them all. Allowing ourselves the space and grace to recognize that some things can’t be completed reminds us that at the heart of the Christian life is the call to be with Christ before we work for Christ. 

I recognize that every ministry context is different and that every person is facing their own unique set of challenges. My hope is that no matter the size of the challenge that we each feel empowered to seek out a friendly ear who’ll hear our struggles and a strong shoulder upon which to lean. In this season of advent the time is now to join hands and wait to greet our Lord with joy and love, presenting ourselves as one body. The God who has come into the world and who will come again dwells among us and is there for you.